Doing Discomfort with Dignity

It seems we are all on a quest…to feel better, myself included!

How much energy, time and space in our minds would we save if we weren’t on this constant quest?

Innocently, within our desire to feel better we are actually creating our own discomfort. What do I mean?

By definition, wanting to feel better means I am not OK with where I am right now. The rub is that not being OK with where I am NOW is actually being created NOW from within me, most likely via my self- shaming, judgment or expectations, knowingly or unknowingly.  

Shame will never bring about behavioral change. Judgment will never bring about security. Expectations will never bring about freedom. Embedded within the desire to feel better is shame that I don’t or judgment and expectations that I should. None of which make us feel better. Is it any reason why we believe we are not OK now?

I don’t know how to tell you to “do” this, but I have experienced that embracing the discomfort, accepting the discomfort, allowing the discomfort to be and flow through me is really the road to feeling better. It’s not an in order to, though. It’s a natural consequence of being where you are and not trying to think yourself out of it (via shame, judgment or expectations).

There are so many courses out there on feeling better, quick fixes, thinking positively or inspired living and I’m sure they offer something. However, I’d love to see a course on Doing Discomfort with Dignity. I really believe if we understood deeply where discomfort truly comes from, we wouldn’t be so afraid of it or need a course to tell us how to avoid it, run away from it, or change it.

Believe it or not, it changes on its own…always.

This is the perfect time of year for our quest to look different. We can experiment with letting discomfort be without shaming or judging ourselves for not being enough or doing enough. Seeing expectations of what I should be up to, how I should be handling the stress or how there is not enough help or time, as temporary thought creations may actually provide the relief you are looking for. Is it possible that feeling better is only one thought away?

2 thoughts on “Doing Discomfort with Dignity”

  1. Batsheva Katina says:

    I found this very insightful. Particularly when I am making an effort to see the good I feel disappointed with myself for feeling down. I am trying to allow myself to have empathy for my negative feelings, disappointments, or frustration. It’s healthy and human to have mixed emotions and to allow ourselves permission to experience them all.

    1. Aviva Barnett says:

      so beautifully said

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