Ever Been in a Funk?

I’ve slowly been coming out of a funk over the past few weeks. It’s so interesting what I saw as an “observer” of myself during this funk.

First off, it felt horribly depressing. I had no motivation to do anything, no creative juices flowing and I felt like I was just surviving the day. There were so many moments of wanting to just escape the discomfort, the pain of feeling irrelevant, the self-judgment for not doing enough or feeling so bad.

Since I am human, in some of those moments, I did escape, getting lost in the wasteland of Facebook (there are some really inspiring Goal cast videos and some funny comedy acts, but they only offered momentary relief).

Then I had moments of allowing myself to feel the pain instead of trying to avoid it or change it. I also had moments of realizing this too is perfect and I don’t have to be afraid of uncomfortable feelings.

In fact, I started to see that the only road to freedom was embracing the pain, giving myself permission to just be where I was at, face the fear and feel it anyway. Truth be told, my fear and self-judgment is just a thought construct, a temporary thought creation that I wasn’t seeing as Thought.

When we don’t see the role Thought plays in our lives, we can innocently create a shield of protection (more thought with all good intentions, of course). We then work hard to maintain the shield in order to keep us safe, sort of like putting a Do Not Enter sign on the Divine flow. However, it is exhausting to have to keep these thought constructs in play all of the time, especially when the safe haven turns into a prison of our own making.

What a gift when the construct falls. When I’m not afraid to let the Divine flow of energy bring me whatever it brings (rather than my limited perspective of what I think is OK for G-d to bring). When I am willing to feel fully and not avoid or distract, the energy flows through the system, bringing to life an experience, as it is designed to do.

Freedom is not letting our thought constructs stop us from living or feeling. So is a funk a real thing or just another thought construct I designed to explain away my discomfort?  Maybe a better sign would be Enter at Your Own Risk, knowing I don’t have to be afraid to enter the Divine flow. Although living in the moment isn’t a risk, it’s life. Maybe the sign could just say Enter, Everyone Welcome.

2 thoughts on “Ever Been in a Funk?”

  1. Esty Raskin says:

    So beautiful and relatable!

  2. shoshana troppe says:

    Wow.fantastic.She gets into funks …I like you so much better now.

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