I Must Have it NOW! A Fresh Perspective on Urgency.

My son got this idea in his head that he had to have a mini Segway NOW!

As he ran into the room, almost pushing me aside from the computer, he said, “I just need to look something up now.” As he searched for the one his friend had, he kept asking, “Can I get it? Can I get it? I’ll use my own money. Can I get it?”

I looked at him and said, “Honey, I’m not getting you anything while you are in this urgent, almost panic like state. Go play outside and we will talk about it later.” While huffing and puffing, he finally left my office feeling defeated.

That evening, he came to me calmly and asked, “Did you think about whether I could get the mini Segway?”

I looked at him and pointed him back to how he was feeling. I asked him if he feels different asking me now about the Segway than he did earlier in the day. He paused and said, “Yeah. When you actually told me to wait for that urgent feeling to go away, I didn’t believe that it would, but now that I think about it, it’s gone.”

It’s a good life lesson. How often do we get filled with that urgent, compelling feeling and then act on it, only to be sorry later after we calmed down and had more perspective on the situation? The truth is he believed the urgent feeling was coming from needing the Segway. I wanted him to learn that it was coming from his thinking about needing the Segway RIGHT NOW!

Don’t get me wrong, he still wants the Segway, but I am glad he got to learn that urgent feelings can pass.

Ride The Wave

By Aviva Barnett, MSW

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