When we hear the expression Parenting Yourself what comes to mind? Caring for your inner child? Being the adult in your life that you feel you missed as a child?
I want to first ask, who is yourself?
Is it the hurt little girl? The anxious teenager? The confused and lost adult? The obsessive thinker? The stressed out mom? The controlling parent?
These are all definitely ways we may think, feel and behave, but they are not you? Who are you?
You are something much deeper than your thinking, your feelings and even your actions. When we touch who we really are….not who we think we are….we tap into our holy and pure essence, untainted, unsullied, all good. We experience security and peace in this place.
Unfortunately, our thinking about ourselves can be tainted. We don’t see ourselves objectively. We see ourselves through the prism of our habits of thought. If our thinking habits about ourselves were to fade, our experience of ourselves would be pleasant and positive.
I had a client say yesterday, when I’m not thinking so much about myself, I feel better. This is because when we allow ourselves to just be (instead of thinking so much about how we are being or not being), we experience a nice feeling.
Parenting yourself in a healthy way begins with being really clear on who the you is in yourself. Are you willing to see beyond the judgments and self criticisms (even though it seems like there is a lot of evidence to prove your perceptions about yourself are true) to your healthy essence, your pure soul, your true Divine nature?
When you can do this for yourself, you will naturally be able to see your children for who they really are. Envision what would be possible if you saw yourself (and your children) as already emotionally healthy, regardless of how they innocently use their G-d given gift of thought. Wouldn’t it positively impact all of your relationships?
