Let’s play a crazy fantasy game for a moment. Imagine what it would be like if after a holiday you got to bask in the joy of the holiday rather than drown in the guilt of what you ate, bother by your clothes being too tight or frustration of the number on the scale.
It almost seems impossible to imagine because it really looks like all of the holiday parties, latkes and sufganiot are responsible for the guilt, bother and frustration, as well as the lack of joy.
But, and this is a BIG but, what if that’s not true? I mean, yes, it may be true that you gained weight, but what’s not true is that the weight gain is creating your upset.
Now hear me out for a moment. Most people don’t realize that thought and feeling are two sides of the same coin. If I spend time thinking about my weight gain (ruminating over what I ate and why I did that), making that mean something about myself (I’m so undisciplined, I have no willpower), or judging myself (I’m such an idiot, I’m so lazy, I hate myself for being so out of control)…then I will feel the heaviness of all of that thinking.
It’s my thinking about my weight gain that takes away joy and creates guilt, bother and frustration, NOT the actual weight gain.
“So how does knowing this help me if I’m still thinking about it, feeling guilty and believing my thoughts,” you may ask?
Because there is a logic to the system of how human beings were designed:
(1) that there is an intelligence flowing through us
(2) that this intelligent energy is taking on new form moment to moment
(3) that it changes and shifts on its own (without needing us to “do” something to make that happen (i.e.: positive think, try to change, control or manage your thinking)
When you understand the logic, your focus comes off the content of what you are thinking (which you are feeling as you think it) and on to the deeper design of the system. This subtle shift brings psychological freedom and healing, as well as a lighter feeling (no pun intended).
